Somewhere Else To Be August 24, 2005
I’m having one of those days when I feel like the requirement to be at work is getting the way of my life.
Workwise I’m in a bit of an odd space at the moment. A recent minor re-org has left as a people manager without people and no permanent manager of my own. My role seems undefined and what I do clearly have to do, while fairly labour intensive, is not really enough to occupy my mind or my time fully.
At other times when this sort of thing has occurred (as it periodically does at the monolith) I might ask for more to do, or fret about what I should be doing that I’m not and whether I’m actually fucking up majorly and no one is telling me about it. But this time I’m not doing either - or at least I don’t intend to. I’m pretty confident that I’m doing all I can with what I have and I need to sit with that, rather than picking at it like a scab.
It is the monolith’s job to fill my time and, if circumstances leave me with a lack of direction and occupation at times, then that goes with the territory. There’s nothing I can do to change the fact that it will happen. It’s my job to do the best I can with what I’m given and to maintain my personal equilibrium through it all. This is my lot as an employee.
While the corporate beast may want its employees to treat the business as their own, at the end of the day the employees own none, or very little, of it and have basically no control over it, so ‘taking ownership’ has very limited scope. Accepting that can only make my life easier.
What all of the above is trying to say is that, I’m a bit bored, but I’m mostly OK with it and I don’t intend to chase anyone around to give me more to do or reassure myself. Things will sort themselves out one way or another, regardless of what I do. This time next week I could be flat out, or not. And it ultimately doesn’t really matter all that much.
In the meantime, though, I can’t help wishing - just a little bit - that I could be at home gardening, or playing with Foozley, doing something fun. I should be a bit careful what I wish for though…
And just yesterday I mentioned you to my manager and said how you couldn’t make the move here because Mark was studying at Deakin. He promptly pointed out that Latrobe here also has an education program.
after the meeting I’ve just had I’m sorely tempted…
unfortunately mark’s family have a very poor opinion of fawlty towers, so I don’t think he could bring himself to study there…
That’s OK, I’ll keep working on you. Primary teachers look very attractive outside Australia.
That should be Melbourne, not Australia. Although I’m sure they look attractive outside Australia too. (I think I should shut up while I’m ahead.)