Opting for a small life August 25, 2005
I started to comment on Helen’s blog, but decided it warrented an entry on it’s own.
About 3 or 4 years ago I came to a few realisations. The first was that, in my mid-30’s, I had probably missed the boat to rise much above my current rung on the corporate ladder. I also realised that I am not possessed of the necessary drive to do anything about that. That I really don’t want to work long hours and weekends, or study stuff purely for its career value. These realisations led to the decision to have Foozley.
I also realised that opting for career mediocrity would limit my ultimate income and lifestyle options. There won’t be a big house in a swish suburb, a flash car, or a particularly comfortable retirement in my future. And obtaining these things is not a motivator for me. As long as I can feed, clothe and house myself within reason, I’ll be happy.
In short, I’ve opted for a small life. It’s a bit of a battle in the world in which we live to remain at peace with that, but I would prefer to opt for mediocrity, than sacrifice my personal and family life in the pursuit of something which ultimately doesn’t mean anything to me.
This is a lesson it has taken me a while to learn.
It has only been in the last few years, after mum got sick, that I have redressed the imbalance between work and life.
I have been obsessed with work, not for what it can bring me for material gain, but for the difference I can make to others. But even that has limits.
Not that it was ever any of my business, but I did wonder what changed your mind about having children. Now it makes sense. Maybe more so because I’ve been walking down the same road. If I’d been in a different relationship, I might have been announcing to you a couple of years ago that I was preganent too. Now I’ll have to settle for the small life without a Foozley.
Bean, I suspect my attitude would be different if I worked in an area I was passionate about. While I’ve mostly quite liked my job, it’s never been a passion and I haven’t yet come across/thought of occupation which I could care hugely about.