Essay Writing, Nicky Style September 18, 2007
1. Read and re-read the topic while muttering “How the fuck am I meant to say all that in so few words?” Wander away feeling vaguely ill. Repeat daily for about 3 weeks.
2. Expend large quantities of paper and ink printing up all the recommended readings. Leave them sitting in a pile on the dining table for about 3 days.
3. Read one or two of the readings and scan some others. Go cross-eyed from boredom … and because you’ve printed 2 pages to a sheet and the text is very, very small. Wait 3 more days.
4. Decide that time is getting tight and you’d better get something - ANYTHING - down in writing. Once you start you’ll be fine, you think. Spend half the morning wandering around doing other things and muttering insanely to yourself. Pause occasionally to wonder why the dogs are giving you worried looks.
5. Sit down at the computer. Check Scrabulous games, read blogs. Open Word. Type 3 sentences. Wonder how you can write such bullshit. Decide that this process would make a good blog entry.
6. Write blog entry. Resist the urge to spend the rest of the morning editing and rewriting it. Hit ‘Publish’. Stop phaffing around.
I’d have also checked the fridge about a million times, and done some random housework.
And not forgetting the multiple cups of tea/coffee that need to be made before anyone can start the reading.
PhD writing, Rad style
Follow above recipe, substitute “months” or “years” for “days”