Just Nicky

Wood for Trees April 15, 2008

I feel very much at the moment as if I’m so lost in the detail of life that I’m missing some bigger picture. The business of putting one foot in front of the other seems particularly engrossing. I’ve no idea why but I don’t feel too perturbed about it. I just have this vague niggling that I’m missing something that would be obvious if I could just drag my head up from the day-to-day.

That said, I think I may achieved one big picture task this morning. I’m about 90% sure (subject to consultation) that I’ve picked the school that Finn will go to next year. It’s not the large you-beaut one with all the bells and whistles closest to us. It’s a small, ramshackle-looking place further down the road located on the almost deserted airforce base. They will be moving to a new site in a couple of years, but for now they’re in a combination of heritage listed but not well maintained buildings and newish portables patched together by covered walkways.

The whole vibe of this place worked better for me than the other school. The plainly spoken vice-principal who showed us around (the principal is on camp with the big kids). The acknowledgment of their limitations while still showcasing their achievements. The fact that there was a kid in one prep class with a cochlear implant and a hearing aid and he wasn’t paraded before me (like a couple special needs kids at the other place), he was just there going about his business. And, finally, I could see Finn there. I couldn’t imagine Finn in the other school.

I feel very much like my work is done for today. I’m sorely tempted to blow off my shrink appointment this afternoon. The beginnings of a cold, the first day of my period and continuing hassles with my back have me disinclined to trundle off to see her. The telly and some knitting are calling to me. I might wait an hour or so and see if their siren song is still strong before making a final decision.